People are shocked at #MeToo.
I kind of feel… Grow up? Were you REALLY that naive? You thought it was something happening to a few by even fewer?
It’s not, and it’s never been.
Then comes the shaming. Shaming of the people who speak out, shaming of the ones that don’t. Reminder that just because someone doesn’t write #MeToo, it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen to them. They just don’t want to write about it, and that’s OK too.
Shaming women for not stopping this. Shaming women for not speaking out sooner. WE HAVE BEEN SPEAKING, YOU JUST DIDN’T LISTEN!
I remember as a teenager, both friends, acquaintances and strangers groped you. At every party, every time you went to a pub. Not one or two, many.
A hand on your body as you walk through the crowd or talk to them, someone starting to push their genitals against your back when you dance, someone not accepting a no.
So many times a friend pretended to be a boyfriend to scare away that person that insisted on a drink or a dance even after countless nos. Because only another man could make them understand that no means no. Another man’s no means no, a woman’s no doesn’t.
If a man groped you and you told him off, it’s just a joke. If it’s not funny, you should get a sense of humour. Doesn’t matter if you’re ten girls saying the same thing. If a man steps up and says it, the groper apologises. To the other man.
If all other men stays silent or laughs with the groper, they continue their behaviour. That’s why we are calling on men to act the change, to be the change. We’ve tried, but you still don’t see us as full citizens. That’s how this can go on.
Men need to ransack themselves, men need to start changing. You have probably done something, and if you don’t remember cause it wasn’t a big deal it doesn’t mean you’re innocent. There are good men, sure. But do you always speak up at a sexist joke? Do you even hear it? Do you see what’s going on at parties and stop it, or are you shocked now?
We can’t do this alone, you need to change your toxic masculinity and change the male norms. Change from within. Speak up. Do better. Teach your sons to do better. Women’s bodies are our own, not yours to touch. Ever.